The First Episodes of the DZ Love Story

          D and I had set our first date for July 7, 2011 but we had to wait over a week for me to return to the state from a family vacation.  We only had time to decide what we would do for our first date before my family left.  Some nights D and I weren't able to chat at all or only briefly through poor hotel Internet connection, while my family took turns getting ready for bed, but even if we couldn't talk he wasn't far from my mind.  Yes it is both cheesy and cliche to say that in a lot of our vacation photos I imagined I was smiling at D, but that doesn't make it untrue.  Oh yes, I was infatuated, indeed.

          After stepping in Lake Michigan and learning I am getting another nephew, dancing colonial-style, climbing the winding stairs of a lighthouse, getting a mild case of hypothermia in Lake Huron, enjoying some Civil War era tunes, Captain Morgan posing while mini-golfing, watching the 4th of July fireworks with a bunch of boat spiders, and climbing a 100 foot high, piping hot sand dune I am back home with one of my last paychecks, signing up for my fall general chemistry course and preparing for my first date.  What huge changes are happening in my life!  I feel like this is all confirmation that I've made the right choice.  The biggest sign is knowing that if I hadn't quit teaching, on June 25th I would have been at a teaching conference instead of J's bbq, and I wouldn't have met D.  I like to think that D is my reward for having the courage to leave my dream job behind.

          On July 7 I put on my Muse t-shirt and blue jeans with the gold detailing and hopped in my Civic.  For one of the last times I take the back roads to get to Steak n Shake and arrive a few minutes later than I wanted.  D is standing by his car and spots me as soon as I enter the parking lot.  He sends me the biggest, most welcoming smile which helps slightly calm my racing nerves.  Last week was nice and comfortable; we were just two people getting to know each other.  Today is crazy nerve wracking; we are two people getting to know more about each other on a date!  I've never done this before.  I don't know what to do, what to talk about, what to expect.

          We are already chatting away about D's work week and my vacation as we are seated at a booth on the half of the restaurant closest to the kitchen. We chat while we pick out our orders, while we wait for food to arrive, as we eat, and long after the food is gone.  The poor wait staff probably wondered if we would ever leave.  After a couple hours, we decide we'd better head to the theater so I drive us across the street to the mall and get honked at as I hunt for the parking lot nearest the theater.  Super 8 is a rather good movie full of action and even a little love story.  This marks the longest time we've spent together with the fewest words spoken.  After the movie ends I can tell D doesn't want the date to end and neither do I, so we check out a car sitting in the mall before deciding we'd better leave since the mall is technically closed now.

          I drive us back to the Steak n Shake parking lot and get out of the car to give him a hug.  This is the first time I notice just how tall he is and how different it is to hug someone whose chin rests on top of my head without stretching.  My ear is at heartbeat level.  The conversation continues until 3 a.m. with us leaning against my car as people arrive, eat, and leave.  One customer even shouts our way, "that must be some conversation," as he leaves.

          He is right; it is a really good conversation.  D is listening intently as I tell him about my teaching experience and all of the reasons that led me to the tough decision to leave my dream job behind and all the wonderful people I got to know along the way.  It is important to me that he understands where I'm coming from, because although it was the right choice to make it was far from easy and my heart still aches from leaving my childhood ambition behind.  I hope that explaining myself fully now will allow him to support me in my new life direction.  I have already had people ask me how I could have made that choice and if I was sure it was the right one.  If D and I are going to spend a lot of time together, as I'm really starting to hope, I want him already understanding my feelings going forward instead of questioning me.  Wonderful D lets me tell him everything I need to, asking questions along the way, and nodding in support when I explain some of the drawbacks of teaching that most people don't see, but which make teaching very stressful and emotionally demanding.  I tell D that if he ever hears me talking about wanting to go back to teaching he is in charge of telling me NO and making sure I never do, because chances are very good that as I slowly forget the reasons I had for leaving that I will want to return for all the good parts.  He laughs, but agrees to talk sense back into me if I ever go crazy.

          At one point D puts his arm around me, I appreciate the warmth and put my arm around his back.  This new territory is not quite comfortable, but not uncomfortable either.  Normally the most physical contact I would have with someone I've met twice would be a handshake.  So do you see why it was so important that he didn't try anything like sneaking his arm around my shoulders when we met?  That little act might have scared me off, and believe me when I admit that I was watching his every action very carefully the first few dates, scrutinizing, wary of any possible ill intent.  Of course, none was to be discovered.  Finally we say goodnight and I hope he gets home safely after such a late night.  I can only get two hours of sleep that night before I'm up and driving my sister and I down to visit my brother for the weekend.  Once again, D and I must wait a little while before we can see each other again, but we decided that we definitely need to make plans for next week!

          A bad weather forecast has us planning on bowling for our next date, but happily Wednesday's forecast changes to great weather and we decide to take advantage of it.  We'll be heading to Matthiessen State Park for some hiking.  The whole idea of dating is still strange and new to me, and I think it will take me some time to get used to it, but hiking is familiar and my excitement beats out my undecipherable feelings about the concept of relationships.  So after my first dream about D (who was a tall faceless man since I haven't seen him enough for his details to be easily recalled in sleep), and some reassuring getting-to-know-you style conversation, I am as ready for date two as I will ever be.

          D meets me at my house Wednesday morning and I take him on a tour of our yard introducing him to a tomato hornworm I'd just caught and a baby praying mantis I found over the weekend.  Back inside Mom gets to meet him and she notices the same sparkle in his eyes that drew me right in.

          D is nice enough to drive and I accidentally direct him to the wrong park entrance so we backtrack to the Dells entrance.  I had advised him to wear pants and shoes that he didn't mind getting dirty since we'd had a wet summer and the lower dells were likely to be flooded at least a little.  We start our journey walking around the upper dells and D makes me smile by doing exactly what my siblings and I would always do (if we could get away with it) on hikes.  The first large boulder we find he climbs right up and poses for an adventurous picture.  A mom and her son walk by us and we can tell the son was jealous.  We are such great examples!

          When we reach the cement stairway, down we descend into the lower dells and are lucky enough to spot a frog in some orange water.  I stop for several pictures of a strange, fuzzy, gray caterpillar like I'd never seen before, and then two tiger swallowtail butterflies drinking from the sand.  D manages to catch a tadpole from a stream and we take turns holding it and taking pictures.  We are both having so much fun, smiling constantly.  This is the first time I've been hiking in a park like this without my parents around to put an end to any shenanigans, and it is wonderful getting to relax and explore everything.  It is also really cool that D is so patient with my picture taking, and that he loves stopping to enjoy the little animals we find.  We even find an adorable soft shell turtle and gently greet him and grab a couple more pictures.

          We make it to the Wishing Well and stop to take in the scene of the waterfall and pool of water.  There are several places to climb into and under the cliffs here and we explore the little caves a bit.  On our way back we follow a group of people through the stream and our feet end up soaked, just as I'd promised.  We had a fun little adventure before heading back up to the upper dells trail and over to the Lake Falls for a top view of the Giant's Bathtub.  From up here we spot a large turtle at the bottom of the falls and D wants to climb down to get a closer look.

          Once down we watch the turtle swim around in the pool and sadly notice that the shell is cracked.  We stay down here and enjoy the sight, sound, and coolness that the waterfall creates.  We are standing on a low ledge near the pool edge and D is right behind me with his hand on my shoulder and I realize now would be a great time for our first picture together.  We take a couple pictures together then take turns taking pictures of each of us in front of the waterfall.  We finish exploring the lower dells and backtrack to catch the last bit of the upper dells before D asks me if I've ever explored the area of the park near the first entrance we'd taken.  I admit that I have never been there and don't know what is over there, so D says, while we are doing so well leaving nothing unexplored, we should go over there and check it out.

          We drive back to the river entrance and race down a trail to the river where we're greeted with a beautiful sight of the dropping sun over the rocks in the river.  We relax here for a while and I realize that today has been perfect.  I had so much fun exploring with D, he was so gentlemanly holding his hand out for me as we crossed obstacles, and now we were alone enjoying the view sitting on separate rocks.  I'm amazed by how comfortable I feel with him.  I'm pretty sure that if he tried to kiss me tonight I would kiss him back.  Since the sun is setting we race back to the top of the trail and wind up out of breath but smiling.  What a great way to end our second date.

If you look "through" the middle of these two you might be able to make a third middle image that appears 3D.

          That week my mom invites D along on our trip the Museum of Science and Industry in Chicago so our third date ends up being a group date where my parents and sister get to meet him and see just how smart and sweet he is.  I give him a lot of credit for being willing to spend the day with part of my family after only two dates.  When we drop him back off at his house that evening I get to meet his parents when he takes me to his backyard to show me the pond his family had put in themselves.  I wasn't expecting his parents to be back there and I was nervous to meet them, but they both seemed very nice and excited to meet me.  So within three dates we'd both met the parents, hadn't been scared off, and were hoping for more dates to come.